Selfish Valentine

He walked through the door empty-handed. To say I was a little more than disappointed is an understatement. Didn't he know it was Valentine's Day? I thought that he would have at least given me a bouquet of flowers or a card.

The entire day I wasn't very pleasant. I went to work and purposefully asked people what they received, tempted to seek pity for anyone who asked me what my husband had given me. 

But I sensed God whispering to me: Did you give him anything? 

That made me even more irritated. Um, of course not, he was supposed to get me something. 

The more that I dwelt upon the question, though, the more I realized how selfish I have been to my husband. I expect and expect and expect without giving. And really, that's what we are meant to do--give. This doesn't apply to just marriage or romantic relationships. It applies to friendships and family relationships. If we all--especially Christians--stopped always expecting people to give to us and instead focused on giving to others, then we would be a much more effective witness to Christ and probably happier too! 

So instead of expecting that perfect gift, give. Give your time to someone, help pay for a stranger's groceries. Demonstrate the selfless love that God has shown us. 

In His love,

Kayla

Take Heed Lest You Fall - Part 2

With every page I read I wanted to read more. And no, it wasn’t the Bible. For some twisted reason, Fifty Shades of Gray was my new bedside reading.

My heart was lonely, and as much as my soul craved time spent with God, my flesh craved lust more.

I touched a little on this last week that when we aren’t satisfied with God, we will try to find something else to satisfy us, and that’s where I want the focus of this article to be: how can we say no to the things of this world so we can say yes to the things of God?

1. Start with your mind.

Almost all sin starts with our mind. It begins with one thought. So in order to become fully satisfied with Christ, our minds need to get rid of all the filth it gets bombarded with daily. Fill your mind with good things, pure things, joyful things (Phil. 4:8).

2. Memorize Scripture.

Part of filling our minds with good things is memorizing Scripture. Truth. See, the devil has a way of convincing us that lies are truth and that real truth is outdated. In order to fight the battle on lust, gluttony, gossip, lying, or (enter your sin of choice here), Scripture is our primary weapon.

3. Pray.

One of the biggest reasons I kept falling victim to sexual sin is because I wasn’t in constant communion with God. I treated Him as a genie almost, asking Him what I wanted and then leaving Him alone until I was in desperate need. But prayer is something that we should hold in high importance. Prayer is instant access to the One who holds our hearts in His hands. Why wouldn’t we pray to Him!

If you are struggling with dissatisfaction, take heart: God is more than enough to satisfy you, and He wants to prove that to you. He loves you with an everlasting love, and no man or book or thing can ever compare.

In His love, 

Kayla 

 

Take Heed Lest You Fall

I love fairy tales. Just those two words send my mind into a world of awe and wonder. The way Beast looks at Belle, the way Eric swoons over Ariel. As little girls—and even as grown women—these stories awaken the God-given desire in us to be loved and pursued and wanted. Unfortunately, those same desires can be turned against us and cause us to become prime targets for Satan’s most effective tactic: dissatisfaction. Let’s face it: when we are satisfied in our relationship with God, we don’t go looking anywhere else. It is when we are in want that things get messy and ugly and can turn sinful.  

Fast forward two years ago, when I became a married woman. When my marriage wasn’t turning out to become the “fairy tale” I had imagined, and my husband wasn’t being the “prince” I wanted, I turned to something else to try to fulfill my unmet expectations and desires. I turned to Fifty Shades of Grey. 

One of the biggest reasons I believe I fell victim is because I told myself I was okay. I told myself that I would never struggle with any type of sexual sin whether it was premarital sex, masturbation, unfaithfulness, lust. Clearly the verse “Take heed lest ye fall” never seemed to apply to me. And that’s one of the biggest lies Satan tells us: I’ll be okay.” Over the next few weeks I’m going to specifically talk about Fifty Shades and its damaging effects, especially as Christians, but I’m also going to address sexual sin as a whole and why this is such a struggle for so many people. 

But today, I want to talk about why. Why did I become so engrossed in this particular novel? Why this book? I wholeheartedly believe one of the biggest reasons I turned to Fifty Shades is because I always thought that I wouldn’t struggle with it. And that is the point I want to drive home. 

The moment you let you guard down, that is when you are most susceptible. When Jesus went to prayed in the garden and came back to find the disciples asleep, he said, “What, could you not watch with me one hour? Watch and pray, that you enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak” (Matthew 26:40-41). Don’t ever for a second think that you are somehow invincible from a particular sin. That, my friend, is when you will stumble and fall. 

So watch and pray. Pray that God would show you any unconfessed sin, and ask Him to show you any areas of your life that you aren’t guarding. He is faithful. And He is good. 

In His love, 

Kayla